When you and your lover dissolve into one being, lips locked, tongues entwined, bodies wrapped in rapture. . .
And the more you kiss, the more turned on you both get. . .
This is some mighty fine kissing!
Are you having hot, passionate make out with your woman?
Is she melting in your arms?
Is the way you kiss her turning her on to the point where she wants you with a hunger, an urgency that makes your lovemaking even more sublime?
Are you inside her with your manhood and your tongue, creating that circuit of electricity from genitals to mouth and back around again in one rapturous road trip?
It turns out that women and men kiss for different reasons, according To Dr. Helen Fisher, leading authority on love and attraction. See more specifics below in the excerpt from her book.
She kisses you to “collect information.” He kisses you to woo you into bed.
Both sexes kiss to become emotionally closer.
If you are not currently having erotic kissing sessions here are my
Passionate Kissing Tips:
- Brush your teeth. (If it’s been longer than 6 months, schedule your dental hygienist appointment today.)
- Limit eating onions and garlic.
- Shave your face very close and smooth. (change your blade!)
- Rub organic olive oil onto your face after shaving to soften your skin and stubble. Then wipe it off with a dry towel)
- Approach her slowly for a kiss. Hold her in your arms first and let your heartbeats synchronize.
- Find a comfortable spot to make out. Check the temperature, lighting and music.
- Start on the “outside” periphery of her body, instead of zeroing in on her mouth first.
- Kiss her forehead, eyelids, neck, cheeks and décolletage before kissing her lips.
- When you kiss her lips, first start with a sweet series of small dry pecks. Make her want more before you give her more.
- Move from her lips back to her neck, cheeks and forehead, then back to her lips.
- Take it slowly and softly. Make your lips soft, full and lush so they feel sensual. Slide your lips across hers.
- Do not hurry. Be in the moment and feel every sensation.
- Take breaks. Breathe each other in deeply. Look into her eyes and connect with her.
- Tell her how sexy and beautiful she is. Let her talk. Let her get anything she needs to say out so that she can surrender to the hot make out with you.
- Be very expansive and joyful. Don’t have any agenda for getting more than kisses. Don’t kiss her to get sex. Kiss her for the sheer joy of all that sensation on your lips, tongue, mouth, face, hands, body. . .
- Warm her up slowly and luxuriously. If you need to set a timer if you have a hard stop, set it and forget it. Go under into unbounded pleasure until the dinger dings.
- Show her your desire for her. Growl, go, “Mmmmmmm…,” make pleasure sounds.
- Reward her efforts with verbal appreciation. Women need to HEAR your approval. This will allow her to relax and get even more turned on.
- Lay her down and get above her. Hold her down lightly as you kiss. Hold her chin in your hands. Hold her hands against the mattress. Give her the feeling that you are dominating her while making it implicit that she is always in control and you will never hurt her. (Notice how the man in this picture above is holding her very securely? Women LIKED to be secured while being kissed.)
- Move her body for her. Take control of everything and reward her for letting go into rapture.
- Use a wide variety of kisses. Pecks, smooches.. Lick her. Suckle her. Probe her. Lap her. Delight in her.
- Mirror her actions too. Notice how she kisses you and kiss her back in the same ways and see if she responds.
Afterward, share “Favorite Frames“ — a technique from Expand Her Orgasm Tonight that brings you even closer together and ramps your sexual experiences together faster.
Kissing has a special effects on the brain, as you undoubtedly know. Kissing stimulates all the senses. When you kiss, you see your partner, as well as smell, taste, hear and feel him or her. The lips have a huge number of neurons that pick up the slightest messages. Then five of the twelve cranial nerves escort these intense sensations to the brain, where they are processed in an impressive factory, the somatosensory cortex. The vast majority of this brain region is devoted to processing sensations from around the nose and mouth– giving your lips and tongue their exquisite sensitivity.Kissing affects more than just your senses, too. It boosts your pulse and blood pressure, dilates your pupils and deepens breathing. Kissing raises levels of oxytocin, the chemical associated with trust and attachment. Kissing also reduces the stress hormone, cortisol. So kissing bombards the brain, bringing pleasure and relaxation.It also give you vital information. With this odd habit, we pick up signals about what our partner has been eating, drinking, and smoking, as well as essential data about his or her genetic makeup. Moreover, saliva contains information about certain genes in the immune system. We are naturally drawn to those with a slightly different immune system– most likely to produce genetic variety in our young. And as you kiss your partner, you unconsciously pick up these crucial data. The smell of a woman’s breath and saliva changes across the menstrual cycle, too, broadcasting the extent of her fertility.Women report that they kiss a new partner primarily to collect information. Men, however, use kissing differently. With their smooching, they hope to woo a woman into bed. Their hopes are founded in biology. A man’s saliva is loaded with testosterone, the hormone that triggers sexual craving. Perhaps this is why men like wetter kisses than women do. The sloppier the kiss, the more testosterone the man transmits.Both men and women say that kissing brings them emotionally closer to their partner–at least a good kiss does. Tender; passionate; considerate: people tend to reason that a sensitive kisser will be a suitable partner, spouse and co-parent. However, an unpleasant first kiss can kill a budding relationship. In a recent study of 58 men and 122 women, 59 percent of men and 66 percent of women said they have ended romance after the first kiss. It was, for them, the kiss of death.Over 90 percent of people around the world kiss. And in cultures where men and women find kissing disgusting, lovers lick, rub, suck, nip and blow on each other’s faces prior to copulation. All kinds of other creatures kiss also or caress around the mouth. Bonobos, our closest chimp relatives, kiss with a deep tongue kiss. Dogs lick. Moles rub noses. Elephants put trunks into one another’s mouths. Albatross tap their bills together. Kissing is natural.But because a kiss can start (or end) a partnership, think before you kiss. — Dr. Helen Fisher, “Why Him? Why Her?”
thanks Susan..your way of of telling the info is great… can you share new ways or ideas for cunnilingus..or eating pussy as common name is if you have article or video on proper way of doing both fellatio and cunnilingus.. it will be great for adding in live of a couple
Thanks! Here are four free cunnilingus and four free fellatio techniques from my Steamy Sex Ed Video Collection as my gift.
How To Make Oral Sex Ten Times Better
claims to experience a mouth orgasm while sucking my cock at a certain angle…Is this possible
Yes, Stuart. All women are capable of having orgasms from stimulation of their mouth, tongue, lips and throat. There is erectile tissue in our mouths that let us have orgasms. https://personallifemedia.com/2014/08/multiple-orgasm-3-steps/
Have any ideas for pre-foreplay foreplay? I mean little things that you may do at home or in public that won’t necessarily be conspicuous, but have her
smokin’ hot by the time you’re ready for actual foreplay?
Yes, Dale. Try my free book, 30 Romance Tricks That Work Like Magic.
Me gusta besar todo de la cabeza a los pies y decirle cuanto me gusta cada parte de su cuerpo y cuan hermosa es que estoy agradecido con Dios por juntar nuestros caminosy que es lo mas maravilloso de mi vida.Gracias
Thank you Susan for helping me become a better lover. I m in a dilemma , I m dating this woman that is the sweetest person in the world! We think alike and share many interests and I love her for that. However, her kissing does not electrify my mind. I can recall a beautiful kissing experience with a gal that blew my mind while I was driving my car. I had to swerve it back on the road to avoid going down the side of the road. So if I don t enjoy kissing with a woman, then what do I need to do? My heart aches whenever I m thinking I m with someone else.
Hardly anyone is born a great kisser. And lovers get better at kissing as they have more time together. So I’d suggest you start slowly kissing her like you enjoy and see if she responds. Just assume she doesn’t have much practice. Bring all your passion to the kissing. Go very slowly. Make sure you are warming her up mentally before you start kissing her. And run your hands all over her body as you kiss her.
Practice makes perfect.
Give her a chance to get good.
I love kissing and can definitely make a meal of it. I love this article. You make so many good points. All I would add is this : – If you’re standing and you are taller than her, use one hand to support her head and neck. The position she’s holding to bring her lips to yours is very tiring and can become painful. As pointed out earlier in the article, a woman likes to be well and firmly held and secured during kissing. I love it when my man has me so securely that I can just let go into bliss.
Yum! Good additional idea, Heidi.
This is a great article, but I agree that I would like to see more from a woman’s point of view, such as the woman initiating and directing the hot make out session, being on top of the guy, growling with pleasurable sounds and making him want her more,etc. It’s helpful, and true, what women want – slow, to be held, touched in different places, feel secure. What do men want and need – other than hopping into bed for sex – and how can women give that to them like in a hot make out session? Your articles are very helpful and informative. It’s always helpful to give tips and ideas to guys and what they can do for us, but I would like to see more about women in charge romantically and sexually, and taking the initiative. How confidence-building and empowering that is for us! Thanks for all you do. Really appreciate it!
A couple of ideas for you, Judy.
How about wearing lingerie around the house?
A slow, tantalizing strip tease?
An incredible hand job with warm coconut oil?
Or a sex date where you lead the way?
I’m sure men and women alike will add their ideas to this list…
The one thing you left out about passionate kissing is lip biting, I don’t mean actual biting, but while passionate kissing a nice soft bite on her bottom lip, and even sucking on them as well. I am in the process of a divorce from a woman who hating kissing, which was always a big deal for me, if you can’t or don’t kiss on a romantic level there is no hope for you relationship to last, we had much deeper issues but I felt like we could never connect without kissing. I have since met a wonderful woman from an online dating site, my profile stated “if you don’t like to and are not a good kisser than that is a deal breaker”. I am so thankful that I had put that on there, since this woman turned out to be the be the best kisser I have ever had the pleasure of kissing. We have the most passionate kissing sessions and it is been life changing to say the least. The connection that it allows you to have with your partner is greater than anything else, it also lends itself to having amazing sex with your partner since you are connected on an entirely different level.
Lip biting (gently) and nibbles is a great add! Thanks, John.
I tried kissing my fiance this way when I picked her up from work this lunchtime. I have never seen her so aroused. For the first time ever , She actually begged me to make love to her, there and then, in the back of my car, in her office carpark.Judging by her yells and squawks, I would say that she thoroughly enjoyed the whole experience. And, as an added bonus, all the way home she could not stop chatting about how wonderful it would be if she got pregnant as a result og our “Lunchtime Snack”. Thank you
I absolutely adore kissing and could make out for hours. I totally agree with Dr. Helen Fisher when she says that a woman can tell a lot about a man by how he kisses and yes – I have decided not to see a man anymore if I did not like the way he kissed.
Taking things slowly is definitely the way to go – having a town stuck way down my throat right away is a turn off. I also really like having my cheek gently touched and feeling the man’s hand behind my neck gently rubbing and massaging me while I am being kissed.
Thank you for your great articles. I just wish that more of them were from the woman’s point of view.
What else would you like us to write about from a woman’s point of view?
Thank you! I appreciate all of your articles but especially this one, as it helped me remember some of my long-forgotten techniques, and gave me new ones! I love my wife very much, but I had taken some things for granted, such as being more attuned and sensitive to her responses. We men, when we’re young overlook many of the important details you brought to light. Being clean-shaven, smooth-faced, properly groomed, having trim, snag-free nails, fresh breath, appropriately cleansed, NOT maloderous in any fashion are all swept aside by the young male mind intent on the pursuit of penetration! How foolish!
Some men are slow on the uptake, therfore depriving their mates (and themselves!) of much pleasure.
I had to learn through trial and error, via multiple embarrassments and disappointments because resources such as yours did not exist; praise God you do now!
I sincerely appreciate your efforts and look forward to more of your enlightenment and edification!
Replies like yours make our day! Thank you!
Also try very gently hardly touching a woman’s eyelashes. This is known as a butterfly kiss. Just going back and forth is very erotic to a woman. Brushing your lips across her eyebrows or her eyelashes also is pleasurable to a woman.
to kiss your lover and making other things that will be amazing
Wow, you left out ears
The ear is designed to pick up the subtlest sensations, so if this is one way you want to send your guy skyward, remember that less is truly more, says Sándor Gardos, Ph.D., sexologist at Mypleasure.com. Place your lips an inch away from his ear and release a slow sigh, which will tantalize his nerves without going overboard. Then take his earlobe between your lips and gently tug. This will pull at, and indirectly stimulate, the nerve endings inside the ear. “These nerves are almost never stimulated, so you’ll really blow his mind when you do this,” says Gardos. Awakening this new erogenous zone will send sexy shivers rippling throughout his entire body.
Thanks for the great addition of ears!
I can’t add much, other than go slow and enjoy the moment
Really new to our society where kissing is not our culture.
Send in those e-books. it would bring difference in our love making in our traditional lovemaking for 37 years! We may renew ourselves.
These tips are quite rewarding and they make a totally different better world. Thanks, and and may I have the ebooks please.
Just click on the ‘DOWNLOAD NOW’ button to get your ebook.
very accurate! Eye contact is especially important. Only thing I would add is he should run his fingers through her hair. petting her face and brushing her hair from her face will make her feel precious and adored.
Love the article, but I have a question…when you say our heartbeats should “syncopate”, don’t you mean “synchronize”?
Great piece Dr, have nothing to add really. But will like to have the three ebooks written by Dr. Thank you.
I have found that the key element is to NOT rush things. Take it very slowly guys. You have a lifetime, why spoil it?
Thanks for these great tips… you won’t mind if I pass a few of these along to the readers of my sex blog for men, will you?
Women are not always the best at communicating what we need from men so it’s always good to give the guys a tip or two… 😉
Not much to add. What and how it was stated was spot on. Learned this way as you explained many years ago. Not sure if I could add anything useful.
That is great information. I got some good pointers to use.thanks.