How do women ejaculate? Squirting is every woman’s birthright. And yet, this wet and wonderful body miracle raises many questions in the minds of men and women. Before we go into who, what, when, where, and why, let’s get down to the basics of HOW.
In This Article:
Now that you know the basics, I want to address the most common questions men and women ask about making a woman squirt.
– Are Squirting Orgasms really the ultimate orgasm?
– Why do some women squirt and others don’t?
– Why are Squirting Orgasms considered the ultimate orgasm?
– What is her fluid made of?
– Where does all that liquid come from?
– How many women are squirting in real life?
– Is she more likely to ejaculate during lovemaking?
– How much ejaculate is normal to release, and how does it come out?
– Does female ejaculation coincide with her usual vaginal/clitoral orgasm?
– How many times can a woman squirt in a single lovemaking session?
– Does menopause affect a woman’s ability to ejaculate?
– Do you have any special tips to help her squirt?
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If a woman is to shudder with pleasure as that sweet, warm fluid gushes out of her onto her man’s hands or penis, there are several essentials to consider.
How to Make a Woman Squirt in 6 Easy Steps
1. Protect Your Mattress. It’s essential to be prepared, so the bedding doesn’t get soaked when a woman squirts. Here are my top two “how to make a woman squirt” recommendations: a) a crib pad with towels over it, and b) a full-size waterproof mattress pad or protector so she need not worry whether she’s on the pad or not and can freely move around anywhere on the bed. Then she can squirt her heart out, throw the wet stuff in the laundry, and crawl into your arms in a dry, cozy bed.
2. Use Lube. I recommend Avocado Oil, a protein-rich moisturizing oil high in Vitamins A and E. It is vastly superior to chemical lubricants filled with noxious chemicals no woman needs on her delicate parts. (It is also better than coconut oil, which has a slightly gritty texture.) Keep two bottles of avocado oil on hand: one that’s thin and light to get her warmed up, another that’s more viscous for intercourse. For those few allergic to avocados, organic sweet almond oil is a good option. Avocado and sweet almond oil feel wonderful, nourish your genitals, and as an added benefit, are completely edible. You can go from oral sex to intercourse with a quick reapplication.
3. Find her G-spot. Considered the “heart of her yoni,” the G-Spot isn’t actually a spot; it’s the whole area up inside a woman’s vagina where you’ll find her urethral sponge. Think of a woman’s vagina as a cave; the G-Area is up toward the roof of her cave about two inches in. If you think of the vagina as a clock, the G-area is located between 10 and 2. Like the clitoris, the G-area gets swollen when stroked. You’ll find it about 1-2 knuckles in, and as she’s aroused and the tissue fills with blood (this is called engorgement), the G-Area will begin to peek out of the vaginal canal.
Both men and women can benefit from a basic lesson on female genital anatomy. You’ll want to have an erotic map that shows you exactly how to touch a woman’s private parts for maximum pleasure.
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4. Use the “Come Hither Stroke” gently at first. Partners: it’s essential to take a slow-and-steady approach. The aggressive come-hither motion is NOT the place to start if you want to give your woman a squirting orgasm. With your palm up, slowly work one finger inside her vagina with some lubricant. Begin by stimulating her G-area gently. A horizontal “windshield wiper” stroke, slowly stroking the wiper across her G-area, can feel good. You can transition to the “Come Here Stroke.” Crook your forefinger as if signaling someone to come toward you. Gently pull up and toward you in an arc as if you are “milking” her G-area. Mastering this stroke is one of the keys to how to make a woman squirt.
5. Go slowly and focus more on pressure than movement. It’s important to find a consistent stroke that feels good to her. Once you’ve found a sweet spot, just hold and deliver. Don’t try to improve it. Don’t change the stroke. Vary the pressure rather than the movement; be sure to ask her what amount of pressure feels best. Be consistent, and both of you be patient; that’s the key.
6. Stroke her clitoris simultaneously with the other hand. She needs her clit gently teased with her partner’s free hand or tongue. Gentle, light, rhythmic strokes are best and are sure to use plenty of lube. Stroke up under her clitoral hood around 1:30 or 2:00 (the top of her clit is 12 o’clock, and the opening to her vagina is 6 o’clock). As always, she should be encouraged to give her lover feedback.
[NOTE: These “how to make a woman squirt step-by-step” instructions should always be customized because every woman is unique, so adjust the approach to meet her needs and desires.]
It’s easy to dismiss female ejaculation as unusual or “weird.” This, like so many myths about this completely natural experience, puts an unnatural limit on her pleasure. Find out what female ejaculate is really about, so you don’t leave this exquisite pleasure on the table.
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For many men, female ejaculation is viewed as “the ultimate orgasm.” It’s one of the most common drivers behind why men want to know how to make a woman squirt. The reason for this goes well beyond the dramatic experience of seeing the watery liquid squirt out as PROOF that she had a sensational orgasm. (Ultimately, this plays to a woman’s advantage because his need for proof is a powerful motivator—he wants her to have this beautiful release that so nurtures her womanhood. Plus, when he sees her release her womanly waters, he gets a rush of masculine confidence in his ability to give her the most pleasure possible.)
Squirting is the ultimate expression of female orgasmic pleasure because it gets her life force moving, gives her sexual confidence, increases her vitality, strengthens the bond she shares with her lover, allows her to bathe in the matchless pleasure of knowing she is living into her sexual potential.
More and more, we women have come to understand what our bodies are designed to do, and we want to experience all of it. From full engorgement to body-shaking orgasms to “flooding” ejaculations, women want to have it all. (And that plays to a man’s advantage because we all know how much a man likes to please his woman.)
All women have the anatomy to ejaculate, but not all women actually squirt. Here are some reasons why a woman’s natural fluid may not flow:
- She’s never heard of squirting orgasms and doesn’t know it’s possible.
- She hasn’t had enough time to build up the ejaculate and get highly aroused.
- She’s afraid to let go because her ejaculate might make a mess.
- She mistakes the pressure on her vagina and bladder as a need to urinate and either holds back for fear of peeing on her lover, or gets up to go to the bathroom, thus short-circuiting her turn-on and her orgasm.
- They have a hard time getting deeply aroused and surrendering during sex.
- She doesn’t feel comfortable with her current partner.
- She isn’t in touch with her body.
- They don’t masturbate and/or knows little about her genitals and arousal pattern.
- She has issues with body image and gets self-consciousness during sex.
- The PC muscles (Pubococcygeus) in her pelvic floor are tense or weak.
- She has experienced sexual abuse, shame or trauma that causes her to go into her head or dissociate when sexually aroused.
- Her partner just doesn’t know how to make a woman squirt.
It’s important to understand that just because a woman doesn’t or can’t ejaculate does not mean there’s something wrong with her. And it certainly doesn’t mean she’s sexually inadequate. It just means she hasn’t learned how to have a squirting orgasm—yet. Part of learning how to make a woman squirt is knowing it’s also important to have compassion.
Women: relax to where you are now in your sexual journey. Know that your path to high arousal and supreme pleasure is perfect. The key is to continue to open and explore, following what gives you pleasure and strengthens your bond with your partner.
Female ejaculation is confusing for a lot of women. Some want to but can’t. Others do but find it embarrassing. Get the facts so you and your lover can begin to enjoy this amazing body miracle.
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A woman’s ejaculate has many of the same components as a man’s without semen. His is more white and sticky; hers is clear and watery.
When a woman gets aroused, several chemical and hormonal reactions occur in her body. The fluid that comes from her Skene’s glands and flows into her bladder is a prostatic fluid of arousal that is doesn’t smell or taste like urine. There may,
however, be small amounts of urine and urea in her ejaculate. When tested in the lab, female ejaculate contains high amounts of glucose, prostatic fluid, and water.
Ejaculate is safe to drink, and it tastes different depending on where she is in her cycle. Sometimes it tastes like sweet hay; sometimes, it has almost no taste. Vitamins can alter the taste of her ejaculate.
A woman’s ejaculate comes from the Skene’s gland, popularly known as the female prostate, located at the lower end of the urethra on the upper vaginal wall. (That’s right… women have a prostate, too!)
Several ducts called paraurethral glands feed the fluid into the urethral canal located inside the spongy mound with ridges called the G-Spot. When this area is stimulated and gets aroused, the paraurethral glands fill with fluid and become engorged with blood. When she has a squirting orgasm, her fluids travel through the urethral canal. But don’t be fooled—just because fluid comes from the bladder does not mean it’s pee.
Don’t believe it? Want proof? You HAVE to see this video by science-geek, sexpert ______ who set out to PROVE female ejaculate isn’t pee.
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The design of her urethra is quite remarkable; it has a “valve” of sorts that prevents her ejaculate from mixing with her pee. Just like a man both urinate and ejaculates from his urethra that runs down his penis, he doesn’t pee when he ejaculates.
In certain studies, women who were catheterized and had their bladders completely drained still produced large amounts of fluid during arousal released with orgasm. Although the fluid came from the bladder, it was not urine.
A woman may ejaculate by consciously pushing the fluid out, or she may squirt involuntarily. Some women ejaculate once during a session of lovemaking; others do several times. Her fluid can dribble, gush, spurt, or squirt out of her vagina. Think of a garden hose with multiple settings, and you’ll get a sense of how variable women’s anatomy can be. Some women release a few drops, others a cupful or more. We know one woman who can fill a quart-sized Ball jar with female ejaculate!
Precisely how the Skene’s glands work with the bladder to produce the fluid is still something of a mystery. It has been said that the process is similar to lactation.
As stated above, squirting orgasms are every woman’s birthright. But this wet, wonderful body-miracle is elusive for some. One of the most asked questions is: “How many women really DO ejaculate when they orgasm?”
We at Personal Life Media were also curious about this. Hence, we teamed up with Sheri Winston, author of Women’s Anatomy of Arousal: Secret Maps to Buried Pleasure, to find out.
Here’s what our survey of over 1,700+ women from different age groups revealed:
- Of all the respondents, only 1% didn’t know what female ejaculation was.
- Only 62% of the women in our survey reported having experienced female ejaculation.
- Of the women in age groups 34-49, 50-64, and 65 and older, 62% had already enjoyed squirting orgasms, and 50% from the 20-24 age group claimed they have tried squirting.
- 6% of women said they “always” squirt.
- 41% said they “usually” do.
- 42% said it’s hit-or-miss and they only ejaculate “sometimes.”
- 23% said they “rarely” ejaculate.
Women who don’t squirt (yet!) are often simply misinformed. Female ejaculation is widely misunderstood. Now you can dispel the myths and enjoy this amazing, beautiful part of female sexuality.
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You’d expect the answer to this question would be “Yes.” It seems logical to assume that women would ejaculate more during sizzling sex, especially when their lover is eager to help out.
But the numbers tell a different story.
Only 41% of women said they “usually” squirt during intercourse, and only a tiny 6% claimed they “always” do.
That means more than half of the women who took the survey don’t always achieve splashing, gushing orgasms, even during sex. Not even with the help of their partners. This could be because these women don’t fully know how to achieve female ejaculation just yet, or their men don’t know how to make a woman squirt. Sometimes women just don’t feel like squirting. Sometimes a woman just doesn’t get to the level of arousal required to ejaculate. Hydration levels also factor into a woman’s ability to release.
But our survey did reveal some exciting statistics for lovers: 53% of “she-jaculators” say they are more likely to achieve wet nirvana when having sex with their partner. Only 20% reach nirvana by masturbating. 27% said it’s the same whether they’re with a partner or going solo.
This is a good indication that, for the women who do ejaculation, their partners are making them feel extra special and extra good.
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Again, each woman is unique, so there is no “normal.” But here is the wet, wetter, and super-soaked breakdown:
Quantity of fluid:
- 1% report releasing a few drops.
- Nearly 11% said “a small amount.”
- 22% ejaculate “more than a little, less than a lot.”
- 35% said the amount “varies from time to time.”
- A whopping 31% said that “it floods!” These are the women who release so much ejaculate, they consider themselves super-soakers.
As for how the liquid emerges, our survey revealed:
- For 8% of women “it arcs.”
- In 10% of women “it dribbles.”
- 46% report that “it varies.”
- For 35% of women their ejaculate “floods.”
Good question. We, too, were curious. We wanted to know if our pet theory—that ejaculation and orgasm are separate systems in the body—bore out in the experience of the 1,700 women who answered our survey. So we asked if their ejaculatory orgasms tend to coincide with their usual vaginal/clitoral orgasms or not. Here are the results:
When asked how often they ejaculate without having an orgasm:
- 5% answered “always.”
- 14% said “usually.”
- 31% said “sometimes.”
- 22% said rarely.
- 27% reported that they rarely ejaculate without having an orgasm.
Asked how often they ejaculate with a vaginal/clitoral orgasm:
- 1.5% said “never (because I’m not orgasmic).”
- 6% said “always.”
- 24% said “usually.”
- 43% said “sometimes.”
- 18% said “rarely.”
As it turns out, orgasm and squirting do not necessarily happen at the same time. That means the popular phrase “female ejaculatory orgasm” is a misnomer. The good news is: if you’re squirting but not climaxing, you can still enjoy the sweet release. Consider female ejaculation a different kind of “orgasm.”
Of course, there is no right answer to this question because every woman is unique, and every sexual encounter is unique. The only way to answer the question is to see what happens.
That said, here are some general concepts to help you relax into whatever happens:
- Any woman has the physical ability to ejaculate multiple times in a lovemaking session.
- The likelihood that she will ejaculate increases dramatically if she has a healthy sexual appetite and is interested in doing so.
- Her hormones fluctuate so results may vary.
- Female ejaculation isn’t a spigot you simply turn on and let the waters flow, nor is it a drip system you can set with a timer. A woman’s ability to ejaculate tends to evolve over time. The more she ejaculates, the more fluid she can squirt. As she gains confidence in her ability to let go and go with her flow, the more pleasure she gets from the experience.
When I first heard about female ejaculation, I just had to have the experience. Initially, I pushed out to ejaculate but could only feel a little extra moistness in my vagina that my hubby couldn’t detect at all. And even that little dribble wouldn’t happen every time. Eventually, I could feel a little wetness each time, and my ejaculation evolved from there. My husband started seeing a little spring of fluid come out of me, and there was a noticeable wet spot on the bed. At that point, we started putting down a towel every time we made love. Soon, the little spring would fill up and release multiple times. My husband would give me short breaks the continue stroking, and I’d ejaculate 5 to 10 times. We continued to practice, gaining more and more knowledge about my body, and eventually, my ejaculate started running out of me and down between my labia and soaking the towel. That’s when we ran got a waterproof sheet (baby crib sheets work great) because so much ejaculate was coming out of me I’d soak through two towels!
Each ejaculation got better and better. I noticed that my stomach muscles were really contracting, and my vaginal walls would clamp down on my husband’s fingers just before I ejaculated. He’d feel the contraction and then stroke rhythmically using different finger strokes he learned from Female Liquid Orgasm. One day my ejaculate squirted out like a little sprinkler (pshh pshh pshh). My abdominal muscles had gotten so strong the ejaculate was coming out of me with gusto. Nowadays, I often squirt like a little hose, sometimes so much fluid comes out I get my feet wet!
That’s how women tend to evolve their ability to ejaculate. In the beginning, it’ll happen sporadically, and she may only release a teaspoonful or two. Then she’ll squirt more regularly, and a couple of tablespoons will come out. Eventually, she’ll be coming about a dozen times in a row. Sometimes she’ll ejaculate a little spritz, and sometimes a cup or more will gush out of her and drench the bed. It’s super hot, and you get to enjoy the pleasure together!
So start small. See if you can get moistness. Then a little spring, a little squirt, then a gush. Work your way up. Give and receive lots of feedback. She should drink plenty of fluid before, during, and after. Men, make sure you tell her “good girl” and “that’s beautiful” or whatever she likes to hear. Give her compliments. Tell her what you see. Encourage her. Give her hugs and kisses. And encourage her to let it rip. Give her as much stroking as it takes to ejaculate. Each time she comes, let her rest a bit, then ask if she’d like to go for another. Often, with a concise refractory period, she’ll want another orgasm and another and another, each more intense until she’s totally spent. Remember, each session will be different so stay open to what’s right for her at the moment.
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Some women think sex is over after menopause, but there is no physical reason a woman who had ejaculatory orgasms before menopause cannot have them after menopause.
Even women in their seventies who’ve never ejaculated before can tap into this delightful aspect of female sexuality. Orgasmic capacity grows with practice, so the more squirting orgasms she has, the better they will feel. I know women in their eighties who still squirt, some even during solo sex. Sex keeps getting better throughout your life; there’s no end to the pleasure if you educate yourself and devote the time and attention to it.
Often lack of libido is due to the drop in sex hormones that comes with menopause. This can readily be addressed with bio-identical hormone replacement therapy, which recent studies have shown is safer than was once believed.
Yes! I have several final tips to “aid and abet” your efforts to include this amazing experience in your sexual repertoire.
But before I do, I want to circle back and talk about context. As I always say, it’s all in the setup. You’ll want to set the mood and make sure she’ll feel safe and comfortable as you explore this delightful terrain.
Do what it takes to ensure your time together will not be interrupted. (Needless to say, you’ll want to turn off your phone!) Get the lighting right with candles or an amber party bulb. Put on some sexy music. Turn on the heat if it’s cold; bring in a fan if it’s hot.
I can’t emphasize enough that the key to opening her floodgates is to encourage feedback. It’s best to approach this as a “team sport” and be eager to know what is or isn’t working throughout your time together.
Men can say something like: “I want to learn the best way to please you. Please don’t worry about hurting my feelings; I’m here for you, baby. My utmost concern is your pleasure.” Understand that this is a game-changer for many women, and it may not be easy for her to speak up at first. Women are conditioned to stay silent lest a man feels like she’s criticizing his technique.
Women: trust that he means it and give yourself permission to break the silence and tell him what works for you and what doesn’t. He’ll love you for it, I promise! Use my Sexual Soulmate Pact bedroom communication technique to open up safe lines of feedback.
Here are four tips that will accelerate your success:
How to Make a Woman Squirt Tip #1 : Kneel
Use gravity to your advantage with this handy way to release her female ejaculate. She’ll be gushing all over the sheets this very night!
Whether it’s her first time or she’s an experienced squirter who’s ready to release more volume of liquid, this is a perfect position. She kneels on the bed while he strokes her G-spot with a steady rhythm. Depending on their body dynamics, he can stroke her from behind or from in front. From that angle, he’ll be able to see the Amrita run down her legs, even if it’s just a few drips or a dribble.
Amrita is another common word for the ejaculatory fluid. It comes from Tantric sexuality or “Sacred Sex.” It’s a Sanskrit word. Many Tantric sex practitioners do “sacred spot massage.” That is the same thing as G-Spot massage or G-Spot orgasms or squirting orgasms. These are all words that mean the same basic thing.
The benefit of this position is simple: any ejaculate that comes out will be more visible to him. Guys are typically very visual, so seeing her fluid will reward his efforts. When a woman ejaculates, she will often feel the moisture before he can even see it. This position makes it easy for him to stay in touch with what’s going on in her body. For partners who get really aroused, seeing ejaculate expressed, kneeling, or squatting can be highly erotic.
If she’s a beginner and still doesn’t believe she can do it, she just needs encouragement. Her release will come at the perfect time. The more patience, the better; it’s the main ingredient that helps her let go. Remember: this is not about getting to a goal; this is about allowing a woman’s body to do something totally natural that happens when she surrenders to the delicious stimulation.
I can’t emphasize enough: her ability to surrender has everything to do with her emotional and mental state. The last thing she needs is to feel pressure to “perform.” It’s a learning process for both of you, so relax and let it flow until she does…
How to Make a Woman Squirt Tip #2 : Milk Her Ejaculate
To achieve that wonderful release, it helps if the man “milks” out her ejaculate rather than expect her to do all the work to push it out. She needs those steady strokes for her ejaculate to come out on its own. It’s best if she forgets about squeezing down and relaxes while focusing on the sensation in her clitoris and G-Area (it’s not actually a “spot,” it’s her whole upper vaginal canal.
When a woman is learning how to squirt, it’s best to forget about squeezing to focus the sensation, which many women do to have a clitoral orgasm. Instead, she can open and expand and even push out as if she’s “birthing her orgasm.”
After a while, she can let go of effort altogether. Ladies, just relax, let your lover take over, and coax or milk your ejaculate out. Your job is simply to relax and surrender to the sublime sensations of having your lover put their full attention on your area.
If you’re a clitoris-centric lover, you’re not taking full advantage of her entire G-area. And that means you are missing out on a tremendous amount of pleasure — pleasure a woman is hungry for. Feed her desire, follow her pleasure, and you will be rewarded with a shower of her ejaculate.
How to Make a Woman Squirt Tip #3 : Straddle Him
When the man is good and hard, he lies down on the bed. Then the woman climbs on top, and with one knee on the bed and the foot of the other leg on the bed, she positions herself over him, straddling his groin. Then she can take hold of his penis and use the tip to run back and forth across her clitoris and urethral opening.
This works especially well for women who can’t let go of the need to be in charge. Or, to be more accurate, she can’t seem to let go on that particular day due to some circumstance she’s dealing with outside the bedroom or in her relationship with her lover. When she’s the one working it, she can rub herself as fast as she wants to make herself squirt all over.
How to Make a Woman Squirt Tip #4 : Three Magic Words
This is for you men: If you want to know how to make a woman squirt and help her explode in a wet, wild, hot mess all over your sheets, just whisper these 3 magic words: “Let It Go.” More than any technique or stroke pattern, this will give her the reassurance she needs to fully
surrender. What women need most is to feel connected to their lover, and by saying “Let It Go,” you signal her that you know how to make a woman squirt and are tracking her turn-on and totally willing to receive her juices—even if they squirt all over you!
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A final note of caution… and encouragement
I’d be remiss if I didn’t alert you to the REALLY BAD ADVICE that gets repeated over and over. As you may have noticed, most of the stuff you read on the Internet is just an “information cascade.” One person says it, and then everyone thinks it’s true—even if they don’t research or have firsthand evidence. There are hundreds of websites promoting BAD G-Spot strokes that will only work on a porn star. Guys need to know that these are not what to do with a woman—especially if she’s not an experienced squirter or is reluctant to give him feedback on his technique.
The aggressive come-hither motion is the WORST place to start if a woman will have the incredible release of a liquid orgasm. That’s not how to make a woman squirt! It’s just plain bad advice that can turn a woman off to the point where she will give up on having the wet and wild orgasms altogether.
Some men can be too rough when they go after a woman’s G-spot—especially guys who’ve been watching porn. You can’t learn how to make a woman squirt from porn! Porn stars are professionals; they can have sex for hours during a single day of shooting. I wouldn’t be surprised if they don’t have calluses on their genitals! A man doesn’t need to jackhammer a woman’s precious Yoni (another word for a woman’s vulva or genitals) to get her fluids to flow. Better to coax it out of her, not bang it out of her. Be patient. Soft. Sweet. Loving. She needs lots of foreplay and G-spot stroking to get fully engorged. She needs plenty of clitoral orgasms and a steady stroke. Use copious amounts of lube and, once her waters start to flow, apply more lube because her ejaculate will dilute it or wash it off.
Guys: if you want to learn how to make a woman squirt and have your lover soak the sheets when you make love, the best first step you can take to help her achieve this mind-blowing experience is to develop your technique. Be sure to ask her to give you verbal feedback throughout. When she’s finished, just hold her, hug her, and get her some lip balm and a glass of water. She’s going to need it after all that moaning and squirting.
Women: squirting is something you deserve to experience. If you consistently play around with your ability to ejaculate, you will start to experience a little moisture. You can experiment with or without a partner and, as you gain experience, tap into a wellspring of wetness. Once in a while, you’ll squirt like a fountain. Then those fountains will occur more easily the more they occur. You will likely start ejaculating during intercourse instead of from fingering or a mix of oral and manual stimulation in time. Be patient as your body learns how to let flow.
Ejaculating makes a woman feel like a sensual goddess. Her body is designed for this natural pleasure. Make an effort, be patient, attend to her emotional and mental state, and you will experience the delicious, fluid rewards.
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