Oral sex can disrupt the pH of the vagina, causing a yeast infection. Here’s what to know. Read on to learn how to have safe oral sex.
Hello Susan,
I’ve been following you for a bit. I’m Ryan, 54, very healthy and fit, married to Nina, 31 years old.
Our sex life has been lacking for many years. I try to improve things, but she has no interest.
She is settling way early for diminished energy and vitality, to say nothing about sex.
I haven’t had oral with her for a very long time. She has a hard time talking about sex or her body much.
I learned that she fears vaginal irritation and yeast infections.
She says that most times in years past that I have gone down on her, she has irritation and sometimes infections the following week. This is one piece of many when she has given up experimenting with our sexuality.
I think she has many misconceptions that she is using to avoid sex and intimacy.
I am cautious about talking about things because she is hypersensitive to any perceived criticism or suggestion to improve things.
What is your advice?
Thanks,
Ryan
YEAST INFECTION
Ryan,
The first thing to do is test both your wife and yourself for a yeast infection. You might have it on your penis or in your mouth (thrush).
Your doctor can help you eradicate the yeast, and you can avoid future infections with dietary management.
Here is a book on how to tell if she has Candida or another similar issue and what to do to solve it naturally.
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VAGINAL SOLUTIONS
It may not be yeast, so you may want her to be tested for a bacterial infection.
For some women, using the VFit helps balance the vaginal glycogen even when there is no infection present, merely an irritation.
Smelly Vagina Solution ⇐ How To Have Safe Oral Sex
If you’re both clean, it could be an allergy to your soap or aftershave.
Once you and she are both sure that you have an infection from oral handling, you can re-approach her allowing you to pleasure her this way.
Maybe if you rinse your mouth out before going down on her, it will assuage her fears of infection. The mouth has a lot of bacteria and food-digesting enzymes. The enzymes can cause vaginal irritation.
I like a few drops of this Nascent Iodine in water swished around in your mouth before oral. If you have an oral irrigator (Waterpik), you can put the iodine in the water and clean your teeth well pre-cunnilingus.
Here is a link to my Amazon store with the water irrigator and the Nascent Iodine.
LUBE
Lube is another potential irritant. I recommend Hobe Avocado Oil, but some people are allergic to avocados, which means this would not be a good solution. Try Sweet Almond instead. For 95% of people, this clean, edible avocado oil is da’ bomb.
See if she’d consider using a dental dam or a female condom to let you lick her clit. That way, she can get clean stimulation and relax more. You can wear non-latex gloves and use lube to finger her while you’re eating her out for even more delicious stimulation.
As far as her energy mindset: “She is settling way early for diminished energy and vitality, to say nothing about sex.”
I’d first assess her nutrition. Is she overeating sugar and not enough veggies? If she’s prone to yeast, sugar is what exacerbates Candidiasis (yeast) growth.
Take action on her behalf to get her to eat more organic veggies and pasture-raised proteins, and healthy fats like avocados and raw nuts and seeds.
The increase in fats will improve your cognitive performance as well as lessening sugar cravings. Bulletproof SNACKS are also zero sugar and extremely satisfying alternatives to junk food.
I also like Drew Canole’s Green Drink as an easy way to alkalize her system to remove sugars and starve the yeast. Green Drink is a powder you mix in water. If she’s drinking sodas, DEFINITELY switch them out for Green Drink.
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EXERCISE DAILY
Secondly, get Nina out on a daily WALK.
Schedule a time and take her. Hold her hand. Go slowly. Walks in nature are romantic as well as healthy. Her energy will gradually improve, and the sunshine will give her that essential Vitamin D hormone she needs to feel vital.
You are right when you say that her sexual energy is linked inextricably to her physical power. So start by getting her eating well and moving, as well as removing roadblocks to her oral fears.
As you take charge and fix these issues, she will respond more femininely because you are more masculine.
Get into a pleasure mindset. Never stop giving her pleasure outside the bedroom, and soon she will be open to more satisfaction IN the bedroom. Your job as a masculine sexual leader is to expand her pleasure levels as much as you can.
SCREAMING ORGASMS
And if she’s not yet ready to let you give her oral, make sure you STILL give her wild, screaming orgasms and breathtaking love-making sessions.
But before she can let go of her passion, you’ll want to make sure no other sneaky emotional roadblocks are hindering your progress seducing your wife.
Sometimes if “other stuff” is not working for her in your marriage, it dampens her desire for any sex. So to find out if there are other issues, do this:
Start with my simple little workbook, Relationship Magic. You can do this couple’s exercise over a romantic dinner. It is a great start, so you both can synchronize your personal needs as well as your romantic and erotic cravings. This puts your hearts, minds, and bodies on the same wavelength, so she’ll know what you want, and you’ll know what she wants.
REVEIVE HER DRIVE
Next, learn to seduce your wife with my fantastic program called Revive Her Drive has truly helped thousands of husbands already. Revive Her Drive gives you a blueprint you can use to spark her undying passion and desire for you once again.
And when you think she’s ready for heightened pleasure, check out Keep Her Coming.
This will help you negotiate the twists and turns of her sexual energy if it plummets.
From there, you can “graduate” to Expand Her Orgasm Tonight. This is a couple’s clitoral stroking practice that will increase her orgasmic pleasure tenfold or more. It’s manual stimulation, so it works great with gloves if she’s still sensitive to oral.
You can train her clit to feel more pleased with the Expanded Orgasm strokes. It will also make her desire more intercourse with you because it will engorge her clitoris and vulva and make her horny.
The next step from there is Female Liquid Orgasm. By this time, she may be ready to experience female ejaculation (squirting).
There is so much pleasure awaiting the two of you if you take the steps as I’ve outlined them. Because skipping steps makes it take longer!
These programs show you how you can build her pleasure scale higher and higher until she’s blasted through her orgasmic ceiling several times over.
Now, this isn’t simply just about having other kinds of sex and forgetting about oral.
You’re doing this so you can show her that even if she’s saying “NO” to oral, you’re still brave enough to keep loving and pleasuring her in other ways.
This builds her trust in you. That you genuinely WANT to give her pleasure. And it’s not just ALL ABOUT YOU and your oral cravings.
Once a woman is sexually satisfied and feels safe and encouraged by her lover.
She will abandon herself to her body’s natural desires.
Now, you have to show her that you’re sensitive to her needs.
Since her fears are aligned with acquiring infections, just showing her that you give a damn about her worries will begin endearing her to you again.
MAKE HER WANT YOUR MOUTH
Another way to ease her into oral is to make her crave the pleasure from your mouth.
This means you make your mouth more appealing, more “attractive,” and more desired.
First, make sure she likes the smell and taste of your toothpaste and mouthwash. If it stinks to her, she’s going to avoid kissing you.
Secondly, do you go to the dental hygienist every six months for a cleaning? If not, schedule one immediately! And keep it up because as you age, your mouth is home to more decay. And women’s #1 turn-on is cleanliness!
Ask her about your beard. Does it scratch her? When was the last time you invested in a very close shaving razor? You can also rub a little of the oil recommended for lube right on your face after you shave to tame your beard if she’s ok with it.
To make your mouth more appealing, more “attractive,” and more desired, try this:
Pecking her neck and nibbling her ears when hugging without sex will move her to you. Kiss her forehead before going to sleep and when you wake up. Kiss her eyelids, hands, fingers, and her arm.
Make your mouth seem like a “pleasure maestro,” so she’ll start begging you to pleasure her orally.
“Can you kiss me right here, baby? Just for a sec?”
The tools and systems are all here for you. It’s up to you to use them.
Step-by-step. Don’t rush. You’re TRAINING her like a puppy with these techniques.
Here’s a recap of what I mentioned to get you started:
Relationship Magic ⇐ Synchronize your romantic and erotic needs and desires. (Learn How To Have Safe Oral Sex)
Revive Her Drive ⇐ Bring back the fiery, hot, passionate lovemaking you both deserve
Keep Her Coming ⇐ Ride Her Sensual Wave Of Pleasure And Give Her Multiple Orgasms
Expand Her Orgasm Tonight ⇐ Give Your Woman The Heightened, Expanded Orgasmic Experience That Stops Time And Keeps Her Saddled On A Never-Ending Climax (Learn How To Have Safe Oral Sex)
Female Liquid Orgasm ⇐ Give Her The Experience Of Wild, Explosive, Gushing Climaxes (Learn How To Have Safe Oral Sex)