“Think of sexual energy as your “life force,” to supercharge your feelings of pleasure, connect more deeply, be more attuned to one another, and experience more vitality.” – Susan Bratton.
My article on Sexual Energy generated several questions from men about women’s sexual energy and the relationship between premature ejaculation struggles and sexual energy.
- What happens when a woman’s sexual energy goes up too fast?
- If sexual energy is a component of orgasm, why do you say it can disable orgasm?
- I ejaculate in less than a minute during intercourse. Can sexual energy be causing my problem?
Let’s break it down.
A simple way to explain Sexual Energy is an unseen feeling in your body. You feel your sexual energy as arousal or a turn-on. You can gauge your lover’s arousal by your senses.
My friend Jim Benson explains orgasmic or sexual energy as a pair of tuning forks. If you tap a tuning fork and hold it next to another tuning fork, the second fork will begin to reverberate at the same frequency as the first. This happens sexually when your lover picks up on your sexual energy and gets turned on because of it.
I often write about Polarity or the magnetic pull of the masculine/feminine. That’s also energy.
And here’s the thing about our nervous systems: We have sympathetic and parasympathetic nervous systems, and they need to be stimulated equally. One needs to feel calm and safe while the other needs excitation. Safety without excitement is boring sex life.
So what happens when a woman’s sexual energy goes up too fast? She pulls away. She has to “ground” herself if you push her too hard, too quickly. Slow arousal and stair-stepping stimulation with grounding strokes take your lover to the heights of sexual ecstasy faster than just giving them an up, up, up, up, up all the time.
Excitation grounded in safety is the PERFECT combination because too much stimulation blows our circuits. That is why a woman’s clitoris can get overstimulated quickly without the grounding effect of a pussy massage and engorgement.
STAIRSTEP YOUR AROUSAL FOR MORE TURN ON
Dr. Patti’s Expanded Orgasm practice teaches you to feel each other’s energy and connect in ONENESS. Part of the Expanded Orgasm practice includes learning how to give a woman “intentional downstrokes” on her clitoris. When you can raise or lower your woman’s energy with your subtle energy systems, you can expand the length of her climax and string multiple, long finishes together so she can come for an hour for you (once you get good at it).
THE EXPANDED ORGASM IS DIFFERENT
All beings can stay IN expanded states of orgasm. It’s about learning to get into an orgasmic state and then stay there with small rests to go higher and higher into more pleasure.
Tim and I have had Expanded Orgasm dates a couple of times a week for a dozen years. We recently did a video describing our practice if you want to see it.
EXPANDED ORGASM VIDEO ⇐ Suz and Tim Explain Expanded Orgasm
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If sexual energy leads to orgasm, why can this energy disable orgasm?
If you let your energy drop, you could move away from orgasm. Or if you let your sexual energy go too fast and, as a man, you ejaculate, then sex is over.
Jim Benson’s Multi-Orgasmic Lover for Men program teaches you the ME Breath technique, which allows a man to accelerate and decelerate his arousal levels with a body-based approach you can use during lovemaking. If you come too fast or too slowly, the ME Breath teaches your body to speed up or slow down so you can come when you want to.
(The Multi-Orgasmic Lover for Men Endurance Sale Is On! Get the “ME Breath” technique that gives you Everlasting Stamina, triggers a woman’s vaginal orgasms, and turns you into a Multi-Orgasmic Man. Get it at 87% OFF Today.)
He also teaches you both the Chi Energy and Energy Cock techniques. Energy Cock is a unique men’s sexual leadership skill… Your lover can make you feel like you are making love without touching you. Exciting!
Now with a woman, if you take her too high too fast and she gets overstimulated, the sex is over. For example, if you overstimulate her clit, she may not want to be touched anymore.
Instead, stair-step her arousal by delivering stimulation with little tiny breaks in between (orgasmic peaking), and she will reach for more instead of her circuits getting blown.
If you’d like to begin your awareness of the Expanded Orgasm practice, here are three free reports from Dr. Patti explaining what an Expanded Orgasm IS and what Orgasmic Peaking (this is the stair-stepping, giving intentional grounding that I mentioned above) and Touch For Rapture is.
Give Her An Expanded Orgasm Tonight (FREE Book) ⇐ Not The Regular, Boring Ol’ Orgasm (This One’s Electric!)
Expanded Orgasm is a solution for clitoral fatigue, for any woman who struggles to have orgasms, or for any woman who wants to become reliably multi-orgasmic.
Expanded Orgasm is the solution for helping women become orgasmic during intercourse. It finally allowed me to have orgasms from intercourse when I was 45.
EO is also a way couples with ED or vaginal health issues can stay intimately orgasmic.
There is so much to this EO practice. It’s changed my life and MANY people’s lives.
It brought Tim and me back together when we were barely having sex, and Expanded Orgasm is something you get better at your whole life.
It’s just really, really special.
I hope you’ll consider learning the simple stroking patterns with your partner (you can also do this to yourself, and all the concepts work on men and women).