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What To Do When Your Husband Is Impotent

“He is impotent. What can I do?”

Elizabeth writes:

“What do you have for us women whose husband or boyfriend is impotent and doesn’t want you to do anything with him and he doesn’t want to start something he can’t finish.”

Hi Elizabeth!

Your husband or boyfriend’s impotence can take many forms. It may be a lack of desire, progressive desensitization from watching porn, shame or abuse from his past, a physical issue making it difficult for him to achieve or maintain an erection due to anything from his diet and general health to an issue such as Peyronies disease or such. There are all kinds of “impotence.” And there are many, many solutions depending on what the reason is.

Take heart!

And most importantly, please do not take his impotence personally. It is 99% likely that it is nothing that you are doing or about his love for you. Here’s what to do. (scroll down)


Bring your kind heart and compassion to a healing conversation with him and keep talking and probing until you get an idea of what it might be.

Start with nutrition, no matter what the case. Get him off of processed foods and drinks of all kinds and get him eating whole, organic foods. Cook for him as much as you can. That’s very helpful for men when they have a partner who feeds them nutrition. This will help his body become stronger to counteract any emotional or physical issues.

If it’s depression or shame, get to the root of it and use tools such as cognitive based therapies to bring the issues into the light and let them go. Listening to Jim Benson’s Multi Orgasmic Lover for Men Workshop called, “Get Hard Stay Hard” will also help him understand what some of the emotional issues might be. Jim covers a myriad of issues and what to do about them in that content rich workshop.


If you and he believe there is a physical ailment, go see a highly experienced urologist. That is the doctor with the most expertise in erectile function.

Have him get a blood test. Good things to test generally are CBC with Diff and a complete Metabolic Profile. Get a vitamin panel to see if he’s absorbing enough vitamins from his food. If he eats a lot of processed foods, he may be deficient which could be a cause. Have him test his hormones — get a full panel. And check his cardiovascular health — he needs blood to pump into his penis so checking his CRP, Homocysteine et cetera will be telling for his doctor in pinpointing where the issue may be.

With you by his side, he can figure out how to solve or work around his issue.
And in the meantime, you can let him know you need holding and hugs. And perhaps you can take up an Expanded Orgasm practice together? Expand Her Orgasm Tonight by Dr. Patti Tayloris a genital massage technique where he will stroke you with a certain pattern using his hands and this pattern will let you have the most delicious orgasms.

There are 21 Sandbox Dates inside Expand Her Orgasm Tonight that you two do together as a couple’s project to learn this technique.

What Is An Expanded Orgasm? <=== Free Downloadable Special Report

Before I could have vaginal orgasms, Tim and I started the Expanded Orgasm practice and that was what allowed my body to learn how to have orgasms when he was inside me, after the Expanded Orgasm stroking. It engorges your genitals which increases your arousal and orgasmic response.

He will enjoy giving you this pleasure and will begin to feel like a real stud just from giving you these orgasms. That may help him begin to connect again to his arousal because you will be so turned on.

You can also give him oral pleasure and hand jobs to build up his “erection muscles.” Bringing blood and engorgement to his penis, if even for a short time or only a little will build and build on itself and aid in his “healing.” Search our site at the top right for articles on “suckling” and “buried cock” to see diagrams and ideas for increasing his erectile firmness really well.

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Finally, don’t be worried or sad! His chances are EXCELLENT that with healthy dietary changes, going for walks every day with you, and addressing the key issues both mental and physical will easily get him to the point where he’s a horny dog for you!

5 Responses

  1. I am a 77 (folks tell me that i am very attractive) and i met a wonderful man who i adore!! He is 84 in great shape but has prostate cancer. Radioactive “seeds” were planted in his abdomen 3 months ago. Since then ED has set in. His sex drive is strong!! The wuestion i have is that once radiation is done will ED not st be a problem? Im the meantime, i will just continue with offering my love and support!!

  2. I am 65 years old and still have a strong sex drive even though I have had ED for three years. I have tried a number of ED products, my favorite being Adams Secret. It lasts for about 60 hours. My wife and I schedule sex for some where in that time frame. Usually Saturday or Sunday morning. Our sex is not as unscheduled as in the past but she understands my limitations.

  3. Hello, Susan,
    Thank you very much for this educative information. I have greatly benefited from you and your entire team.

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