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Let Her Just Lie There

Let Her Just Lie There

Queen Victoria is rumored to have told her daughter to, “Just lie back and think of England,” when the princess was concerned about having to fulfill her wifely duties on her wedding night. Though this is an urban legend, there is a cultural sentiment that a woman who “just lies there” while making love is a woman who is bad in bed.

Add to this that adult video primarily portrays women as being very active during lovemaking and it’s no wonder we get the idea that just lying there is not very sexy.

If you’re just lying there, how engaged could you be?

Let me right this misinformation.

It is perfectly normal and acceptable for a woman or a man to simply lie there and enjoy the sensations in the moment.

One of the things I show you how to do when you have an Expanded Orgasm practice together is a Still Touch.

  • Still touch: in this touch, not only are you still, but energetically, you feel present and alert; your attention and intention are on feeling your partner, even if you are not moving. Your hand should be resting on her at just such a pressure that allows you to sense the flows and currents taking place inside her. Too heavy a touch, and you will miss the nuances to be savored. Too light a touch, and you will again miss much of the information she wants to transmit to you.

It is delightful to make love in near stillness, looking into each others eyes, slowing our breath, feeling him inside her, noticing the rush of blood, the pounding of hearts, the joyful orgasmic feeling you are co-creating.

Sometimes moving around reduces the connection to each other.

Give your woman permission by encouraging her to be still, to simply receive and enjoy.

Remove the “quid pro quo” from your sexing. There’s no need for you to keep score, for her to “do you” the same as you “do her.” It’s all about mutual pleasure, not about the tally.

If you are tapped into her sexual energy and you have learned to read her bio-feedback, she need not give you blow by blow reports on her status, though moaning and making it safe for her to give you audio feedback can be very helpful for you to know how she is feeling and for her to amplify her pleasure.

Lovers who are primarily visual in their trance state of lovemaking close their eyes to feel more. Don’t take it personally if she’s closing her eyes. Our eyes dilate naturally when we become aroused and low light is helpful. However, when either of you are climaxing, it is more connected to open your eyes, so encourage her to look at you as she peaks.

I find that slowing down, waaaay down, can increase your arousal and desire. Try it tonight and let me know how you do.

Allow Yourself To Feel.

With love,
Patricia Taylor

What Is An Expanded Orgasm... And Why Do Women Love It So Much?

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