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Past Disappointments KILL Desire

Sometimes illness mutes desire.

Sometimes lack of passionate sex depresses you.

Here’s what to do to get your life force flowing again:

“Dear Susan,

Thank you for forwarding me the information on overcoming past pain and failures.

I had no idea that my past experiences could stunt my desire.

But when my wife comes in, I find ways to avoid intimacy. I don’t remember much of my personality before my illness, but I seem to have ignored her emotional needs for many years.

So, she has withdrawn from me. We are roommates without benefits. So, I need to face my great disappointments and find a way not to blame my wife for them. I need to face my fears and disappointments first before I can feel more desire.” —Ron (not his real name) 

Here’s my response: 

“Hi, Ron, 

In facing your fears and disappointments and feeling them, sitting with them, and grieving for all you have lost, you will open your heart to more love, happiness, and joy.

Because you see, the heart is a big door. It’s OPEN, or it’s CLOSED. You might have it a bit ajar and feel a little of everything, but once you feel ALL your feelings, especially the hard ones, the love can get in there in a big way too.

Crack your heart open.

Grieve for your losses and frustration.

Then let it all go and start giving out all the love you can.

Detach your giving of love from sex.

Just start with romance. 

Then add some hugging, stroking, cuddling, and breathing together.

Take your time and enjoy the adolescent desires that begin again whenever your body and soul are ready.

Let your wife hold you.

Hold your wife and pour love out of your heart and into her being.

Soon you will find the loss and sadness melting away, and in its place, so much love, all the love you want, need, and crave, as does your wife. 

I suggest you start with Expand Her Orgasm Tonight — our 21-day program for couples. 

Click Here To Expand Her Orgasm Tonight ⇐ The Most Pleasurable Orgasm Women Can Experience  

It’s you giving your wife a genital massage that includes feeling each other energetically and through Tantric touch. 

It’s beautiful, life-affirming, and will again fill your heart with love. 

Expanded Orgasm is a great way to ease back into sensuality together in an adorable way. 

And you do the 21 play dates at your leisure, and over time, you have so much fun and get reconnected. 

Someone’s knocking on the door.

Someone’s ringing the bell.

Please do me a favor.

Open the door.

Let her in.  

Click Here To Expand Her Orgasm Tonight ⇐ The Most Pleasurable Orgasm Women Can Experience  

4 Responses

  1. I don’t think women need intellectual superiority. Look at all the happy couples where the woman is the breadwinner and the man is the homemaker. First, be a friend. Give her emotional love first. Be unselfish and want what’s best for her. Listen. That’s where you start. A good counselor might help. You need to start the repair. Having the desire and the will to repair your relationship is a great first step.

  2. As a women, I think it’s very possible that if you take masculine initiative sexually and learn the skills to seduce her, you could turn your whole marriage around!
    By focusing on making the sex better, and sexually satisfying your wife, she will change. Susan Bratton has many tools to help! I also recommend Kim Anami’s work.
    I believe it’s worth putting all of your effort in, because the reward is worth the risk (I don’t think it could get much worse, but you could get potentially clearer on it not working.) If it doesn’t work, you can know that you did everything in your power to make it better, and be open to moving on.

  3. I think the title said it all for me. My wife has felt disappointed in me from many aspects outside the bedroom which has led to no intimacy whatsoever now. We’re basically roommates. The disappointment comes from my career choices to poor communication to lacking detailed attention to things. How do I reignite the spark back in our marriage when the other things are not going well or is it simply a lost cause because I married someone that has proven to be intellectually superior to me?

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