Welcome to Part 6 of my Romance Challenge Series featuring techniques from my 5 Pillars of Passion.
Each week I’m dropping one of my road-tested Romance Tricks That Work Like Magic to add a dash of zing to your love life. If you’re solo now, practice this tip on friends. They love to be loved by you too.
Here’s Romance Trick #6: Set Up Your Loverspace
How much time do you spend preparing the room for lovemaking?
Do you run in, bounce on the bed and holler, “Yeah, baby, let’s do it!”
Well, you’re probably doing a little better than that, but for someone to really let go and surrender into bliss with you, I suggest you do what Dr. Patti Taylor calls, “Setting the Loverspace.”
I can’t wait to tell you about what this means for the future of your love life. Setting Loverspace makes a profound impact on both your ability to relax and surrender to your bodies’ pleasure together.
Setting up your Loverspace lets you enjoy delightful anticipation of time you will spend together in physical intimacy.
When you put attention on creating a pleasant atmosphere for foreplay, the lovemaking that follows is much sweeter and more erotic.
Every person is unique, so you must explore with them what kind of Loverspace set up they would find most luxurious. Find out the following things by asking them:
“When we make love, if conditions were so perfect for you that you could relax and totally enjoy yourself, what would they be?”
1. Would it be lighter or darker?
2. What temperature would the room be to make you most comfortable?
3. Which room would you like to be in?
4. Would you enjoy music or silence?
5. What is your favorite kind of massage oil or cream?
This is called, “Running a Menu.” Once you know what they prefer, make them so.
Bring hand towels or washcloths folded in a neat pile. If they like it darker but not pitch dark, try a 30-Watt Orange CFL Light Bulb
See if you can make it very comfortable for your lover in the room so they can just relax and be with you.
Then start very slowly, just talking, hugging, holding, touching and lightly stroking each other. Move into massaging and kissing and let your romance evolve from there if you both feel inclined.
Sometimes it’s nice just to romance each other and feel their body without hoping for sex.
By being less needy, it sometimes works in your favor. Other times, they’re longing for you just to tell them exactly what to do and take them on a sensual ride so they can enjoy your initiative and surrender to each other’s masculine/feminine polarity.
Previous tips you might have missed: