Do you want to know how to please a woman in bed? I received a letter from a fan named Don who asked that very question. In the video above you will hear his whole story.
In his letter, he has the self-realization that not only does not know what to do for her, but he does not know what he really wants either.
I gave Don a VERY detailed outline for how to please a woman sexually in bed and set the stage for a night they will both remember for a very long time.
We are going to go over the game plan I gave him so you can create a night of passion that will please a woman in bed and leave her wanting more!!
You can mix and match these steps, add things, and leave out the things you don’t like. Keep in mind that there is no right way. Find the things that work for the two of you and you will definitely please a woman sexually in bed!!
Let me walk you through a lovemaking scene so you will be thinking about all of the ways to taunt, tantalize, and teasing your wife for a day or two before you pull this off.
- Get her some lingerie and you’re going to have it laid out on the bed. She’s not going to know that this has all been taken care of.
- Make the room the temperature that she likes.
- Put on the music that turns her on the most.
- Get some candles ready.
- Heat up some coconut oil for her body massage. (Organic coconut oil in a squeeze tube so it’s melted and warm. Put a sink full of hot water and put the bottle there.)
- Put in some organic avocado oil is a bottle as well. (This you will use on her yoni.)
- Get a pitcher of water and a glass or two and have them by the bed.
- Make the bed really nice.
- Throw down a waterproof sheet. (It could be a crib pad; it could be a little sheet that you tape around your bed.)
- Put another sheet on top of that.
- Put a stack of towels on the bed.
- Get that room ready for lovemaking.
- Last, lay out the lingerie and some sexy shoes. (This could be something she owns or something that you bought her.)
(There are a lot of articles on this website about what kind of lingerie women like. The safest things to get are usually a cup-less bra and crotchless panties. But in this case, you might also want to get her sexy underwear, a chemise or a something that covers her up that you can take off her too.)
- While dinner is cooking, you will move her off into the living room and you’re going to give her a foot rub or neck rub.
- You’re going to stroke her hair.
- Tell her how sexy she is and how much you want her.
Then, after dinner, you will tell her, “I have a surprise for you. Don’t go in the bedroom until I let you, and I WANT you to go in there. There’s something on the bed and I want you to put it on and then I’m going to come in and see how I like it.” That sets up what she’s going to do for you.
We girls love presents especially a sexy one.
- Have a nice relaxing dinner.
- Tell her how sexy she is, and how much you love her.
- You guys are going to laugh.
- Be playful and flirt with her.
- You’re going to be silly.
- Charm her with your words first.
Then, when dinner is over, you’re going to pick her up, carry her to the bedroom and say,
“Okay baby, I’ve got a very nice night planned for us and I want you to take off all of your clothes and put this on, I want to see you in it.”
You are can help her put that lingerie on and then say, “First come over here and let me love you. Let me hug you and hold you,” and you’re going to sit up on the bed with a bunch of pillows behind you like a throne and you’re going to have her come into your arms and lie there beside you.
Stroke her hair and her body and say, “Let’s just hug. Let’s relax for a minute because we’ve got plenty of time and we’re going to have some fun tonight. Just relax.”
Hold her and calm her nervous system down and look into each other’s eyes.
You will start breathing deeply and have her breathe with you so that you get really relaxed together and then you will say “Hey, is there anything that you want to talk about? Is everything good? Are you comfortable?”
If she needs to get anything off her chest, this is the time you listen. This is an often overlooked part of how to please a woman in bed.
Soothe her and stroke her.
She’s got on her lingerie. You keep telling her how sexy she looks and give her specifics like “Your breasts look so gorgeous in that cup-less bra. I love the way they’re so perky. Your kind of nipples are the ones I have always loved the most. They are so suckable.
Say things like that, whatever is real for YOU. Go inside yourself and see what’s coming up for you that’s real. Then you will start by giving her a body massage. Now, this is where you may want to remove some pieces of her lingerie.
You will move her and say “Okay baby, I want you to lie here. I’m going to give you a massage. Give her a nice massage and get her loose and fluid.
- Roll her around and start kissing her a bit.
- Get on top of her.
- She’s lying back on the bed. Get on her and come down over her.
- Pin her hair down and kiss her face and forehead.
- Kiss her neck and her chest, her shoulders, her mouth, but you only brush your lips on hers and come back. Then you brush again and maybe do a little lick and then come back.
What you’re doing is giving her a lot of variety, and letting her relax into the sensation of you making out with her.
Then you can go further depending on the kind of kissing she likes to do with you. You can kiss her, have French kisses, or deep probing make-out kisses as you’re running your hands all over her body.
What you’re doing is awakening her sensual grid.
You want to fire up the proprioceptive skin on her body so that she can feel her whole body. You’re making her whole body come alive. Then get it’s time to get the pillows and set her up.
Set her up on the pillows and go down on her. Remember that you’re working your way from the outside in. You’re not going straight for her clitoris.
- Tell her how beautiful her pussy looks to you.
- Give her details of everything you like about her pussy.
- Talk to her about how it’s getting more and more turned on.
- Once it looks plumper, then you start to give really good oral sex.
- You are going to ravish her.
- If she comes, that’s great. If she doesn’t, don’t worry.
- Use your fingers and hands as well.
I don’t want you to just lick her pussy with your tongue. If you want to please a woman in bed you need to use your hands, to touch and stroke her g-spot. Slowly work your way in. I want you to give her blended orgasms.
Get as much blood to her yoni as possible because remember that she has a penis too. It’s inside her and you want to get her whole clitoral structure, the clit, the shaft, the legs, the vestibular bulbs, I want you to get all that stuff engorged and full of blood so that she basically has a hard-on in her vulva. Then you want to get her to the point where you start moving around on the bed.
- While you’re eating her pussy, you want to move her legs.
- You want to lift up her butt.
- Jiggle her a little on your face.
- The whole idea is you’re in charge.
You’re moving her and when you move a woman’s body, you move her emotions. She will have so much fun.
You might flip her over. This might be the time when you give her a couple of little smacks. Spanking can be a really nice thing. It doesn’t have to be a hard spanking. You just want to enliven her little sweet cheeks with sensation.
It can be little tiny pats or it could be little squeezes. This doesn’t have to be a spanking. You will get her going because it’s a little naughty, it’s something new.
Then you want to say to her “I want you to go down on me now. I want you to get on your knees on this towel on the floor and I want you to give me three little licks.” If she’s not big on going down on you, make it super short. Make it a finite thing. I want you to give me three little licks.
I teach these techniques in my book called the Blowjob Secret. You can learn all about how to get your woman to love to give you oral sex and I’ll tell you all the benefits to women in that book.
I want you to get her down on her knees on the floor. I want you to hold her hair and I want you to slowly have her give you a couple of little licks.
Remember, grooming is VERY important.
I want you to make sure that you’ve shaved back your pubic hair. If you’ve got any of those little scraggly hairs that dangle from the bottom of your penis chop them off.
You can look up manscaping at www.personallifemedia.com. There you will find the two tools that I have used and recommended for years. You don’t have to wax. You don’t have to shave. These are like a beard trimmer and a close shaver. Get your junk manscaped and it’ll be much nicer for her.
When you wash with soap, rinse very carefully!! Some soaps can have a bad taste. When a woman takes you into her mouth, and it doesn’t taste good that is no good. Watch details like this.
Women are very sensitive to flavors, smells, tastes, and the feeling of things. You want it to be friction-free oral for you. You want to make it super easy for her to have a great time.
Then you want to tell her that she’s going to have to beg you to have sex.
Tell her that you’re not going to put it in until she begs you and when she does, I want you to pick her up and lay her down on the bed. Then open her legs and push her down. Make sure she’s down.
Hold her with one hand and hold your penis with the other one. Tap your penis on her vulva. Tap it on her clit. Rub it around. Go above her clitoral hood, in that slick tissue that’s just above her clitoral hood, all the way down to her perineum.
Don’t tap your dick on her anus. Don’t get the penis near the anus if you’re putting it in the vagina. But you already know that!!
You want her to be like “Oh baby come on; you’re driving me crazy. Stick it in. I want you so bad.” That’s what you’re going for.
You’ll know you’ve done a good job when she’s playing along and having a great time with it.
Remember that what you’re doing right now is roleplay!!
You don’t have to do it perfectly and you might have to stop. She might say “I don’t actually like that part.” All you say is thank you and you say “How do you like this?” and try something else.
You can give her other options. When you are making love to her, you want to please her.
Try a few positions. Bend over the bed, baby I’m taking you from behind. Or, put those high-heels back on.
Change positions a couple of times to make it memorable. The whole time continues telling her how unbelievably sexy she is to you and how much she turns you on and how no other woman does it for you.
Keep giving her really good positive feedback. You want to give her permission. You want to tell her she’s great and you want to be the guy in charge.
Remember that after you’ve come, she might still have a few more orgasms in her!!
Put your fingers in her and stroke her g-spot while she holds her vibrator on her clit to have a few more orgasms because once she’s penetrated, it gets her whole vulva really warmed up.
A lot of times you might be satisfied. She may have a few more in her. Ask her, “Hey I’d like to do this to you now. I just think I’d like to get a few more orgasms out of you. shall we try it?” Have the vibrator clean and ready at the bedside table.
That, my man, is masculine sexual leadership!
- Don’t make her wonder what the plan is.
- She doesn’t have to figure out what to do.
- You are in charge so she doesn’t have to tell you what to do.
- She follows along.
- You have all of the tools to please your woman sexually in bed.
She gets fantastic sex and lots of orgasms from a man who totally adores her and finds her incredibly sexually irresistible.
Start there and as you’re doing it, things will start coming up for you that you’d like to do too. Things that you’ve thought about or that occur to you at that moment.
Tap into yourself and as you start doing these things, you’ll find your zest, vitality, and connection to yourself and to your woman continues to grow. You are learning with her what works for you both. That’s how you please a woman in bed.
Seriously need a helping hand or two. In person. Not video guides. My wife is clueless when it comes to the art of seduction. Her oral skills are..oh gawd, please don’t. And now that I have ED folloeing a serious injury, sex is so frustrating. She doesn’t respond to oral, or manual stimulation. Her Hitacho Wand is the only way. I’m fine with that, up to a point. It would be great if I were needed. I would love to be able to drive her to an orgasm with only my tongue and fingers. But, it’s not me that is the issue here. She has NEVER even had an orgasm on her own. Not even as a much younger person.
I don’t know what to do. I would love for an actual hands on instructor to join us. Demo etc…Is that a real thing out there somewhere? Makes no difference to me, man or woman. How do I convince her?