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How To Get Your Sex Life Back On Track

Here is an email from a man whose wife is taking anti-depressants. Read what Chas August, one of our coaches offers as a solution.

I bought Revive Her Drive and started reading (along with your emails), hoping to begin to turn a depressing situation around. I’m doubting the kind of success you write about is possible, but some measurable improvement would be worthwhile. My wife has always had roadblocks on issues she will not discuss or consider (oral is out, either receiving or giving, for ex.), she takes meds for depression which curb both her interest which was never high, and her ability to climax, and her energy level has been low since she was treated with surgery and chemotherapy for lymphoma and other issues. Thankfully the lymphoma hasn’t come back but another medical issue will remain the rest of her life. (She goes to bed by 9 pm, around the time I get home.)

I cuddle and kiss her every morning after my shower, which is nice for us both, but that’s about it except roughly 7 times a Year. Yes, year. I’m not sure how much longer I can go living with a roommate. I still love her after over 36 yrs of marriage (and two wonderful grown daughters) but this has got to change. Am I barking at the moon here?


Hi Peter,

My name is Chas August. I’m a coach with the PersonalLifeMedia Coaching Program .

I wanted to take a moment to check in with you. It’s been months since Susan mentioned you might be interested in coaching and I wanted to reach out and see if I could answer any questions you have. I know well the difficulties of living with a depressed partner and it is very sad to me that medical world seems to treat loss of libido as an acceptable side effect of so much anti-depressant medication.

In my work with cancer survivors, I’ve learned how challenging it can be to find libido after diagnosis and treatment. IMO, healthy sexuality is one of the most powerful and important “treatments” to get back to and maintain a healthy life.

Meanwhile, what about you? What about your needs? What will keep your “love-tank” full, so you can generously give to others? Learning how to “source” ourselves is so important, especially for caregivers. And, sadly, most of us never learn much about how to love ourselves.

Neil, please make sure you get the support you need and deserve as you continue to navigate the changed and changing circumstances of your marriage.

To find out more about the PersonalLifeMedia Coaching Program and to “meet” our coaches, just go to this link


Chas August
Life, Intimacy &
Relationship Coach,

“Live as if you were to die tomorrow. Learn as if you were to live forever.” – Mahatma Gandhi


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