Want to engender your woman’s femininity?
Want to inspire her erotic abandon?
Want hot, sexy charge in the bedroom?
Want a deeply intimate relationship full of passion?
The answer is Polarity and increasing your masculine energy.
Polarity is the attraction of opposites – the magnetic pull of the masculine/feminine.The Yin|Yang.
The more you bring your masculine energy to your relationship, the more your woman can be her feminine self, which makes lovemaking hotter, more intimate and more satisfying.
“Your blogs and emails have been nothing short of amazing. Your newsletter is a blessing for relationships everywhere! As a result our lovemaking has been over the top. We now find ourselves not only wanting more lovemaking but actually having more. Believe me my wife’s sexual desires are much stronger now and she is in her mid 50′s. I want more and she wants more.”
Polarity is one of the Four Elements of Revival outlined in Revive Her Drive – the four steps it takes to turn your sexual relationship from flat or worsening to turned-on and slipping pleasurably up what I call “the upward pleasure spiral”.
Click Here for Romantic Stealth Techniques That Bring Out Her Femininity
Many members write to me asking me to define polarity and explain ways to be more masculine in relationship. This 25 minute audio is my answer to how you do just that.
Polarity by Susan Bratton Right click on any of the purple download button to save the MP3 and/or transcript to your desktop. ===>>>
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Polarity by Susan Bratton (Get The Transcript Here):
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Additional Resources on Polarity and Increasing Masculine Energy
How to carry her to the bedroom
How to get the polarity back into your sex life
Instant confidence with women –
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Here’s how to cultivate more POLARITY – the attraction of opposites – the magnetic attraction of masculine energy to the feminine.
Our culture and feminism have eroded polarity which needs to exist for attraction and passion to happen in the bedroom.
Today’s marital team approach bleeds into and inhibits the polarity that is required for erotic turn on.
What can a man do to get polarity back? Many thing that you will find she naturally responds to in a more feminine, appreciate way such as:
Taking ownership of the health and happiness of your relationship. Are you playing the bigger game? Putting your relationship above your individual happiness?
Fostering her respect through respecting yourself, setting boundaries around the quality of communication you will allow in your relationship, proving a secure and safe place for your woman to feel stable and relaxed.
You want to create more masculinity in your own way of being so she feels drawn to you.
If you begin to reward her and give her approval she will feel more secure.
She’s looking for your leadership, she wants your approval, no matter how strong and self-sufficient she is. If you’ve allowed the power to slip over into her control… If she makes the decisions, the plans, and determines what’s acceptable in your relationship, if she sets the tone, then you have forfeited your masculine leadership. This is one of the biggest marriage wreckers… You must take charge now.
When you take control back you must use, “appropriate dominance.” This means that though you are the leader in setting your plans and strategies for living life together, you are always taking into account her needs and seeing life through her eyes and getting her feedback before you make unilateral decisions that may upset her. She wants you to take control, but not at her expense.
Since you are always training her with everything you do, where ever you are now in your interrelating is because of the actions you’ve taken to date. To change how you relate, you must start by changing your own behavior.
If you begin to appreciate her and give her affection, and you fill her up with these two things, you will begin to receive them both back from her.
You must cultivate your own self-confidence, your own air of certainty. She is your charge and your inner strength in navigating life’s pleasures and challenges will help her relax into her femininity and give you the affection you so crave.
Take time to generate an emotional connection to her – get her talking about her emotions, how she feels, what is going on inside her mind and her body. Don’t be afraid of her emotions. Welcome them. Remember that your strength is her lifeline to her emotional feelings. You are the riverbanks, she is the river. You are the tree, rooted deeply in the earth and she is the hurricane, sometimes raging all around you, while you stand firm, solid and available.
When you’re not trying to fix, and instead just listen to her emotional dialogs, she will feel more safe and protected and secure, which will lead to deeper intimacy together. This concept is called, “holding space,” and is very powerful.
When you hold space for her, you make it ok for her to be completely honest and say and do what ever she needs to do and say to feel the emotions she needs to feel as a woman. Honesty: can she tell you ANYTHING? If the answer is no, you need to create that trust with her. Find out what would allow her to be completely and totally open with you. And give her that. Then she can relax around you and she’ll feel more open to being sexual with you, because she knows you are her protector and that she is fundamentally important to you.
As well, when you are both strong and secure in yourself and committed to caring for her as your woman, sharing YOUR deepest fears and regrets will bring you two closer together. This kind of vulnerability, without neediness, bonds you two together more deeply. Vulnerability also creates trust for her to surrender in your arms.
In the bedroom, you must show your pleasure in being with her and respect her for being sexual with you. When you reward her for sexy behavior, she will give you more of it.
Further to being the man she can rely on, you also want to cultivate your own life force. If you are a man with a mission, a man who has an ambitious plan to live his life as a wild, exciting, beautiful adventure, she will want to participate in your life with gusto.
Women want playful adventures with their man.
Women want to be transported erotically.
If you cultivate your confidence and personal authority, take leadership over your relationship together and then bring pleasure into her life everyday, you will see her blossom into the kind of woman you treasure.
If she can trust that you’ll take care of her, she can stop worrying about that and be more pleasurable for you.
Instead of begging for sex, or bargaining for it by “doing chores,” you’ll become the man she wants to be with. Get out of your scarcity mindset and bring abundance to your relationship. Celebrate tastes, sounds, smells, touch – get her to feel life’s pleasures again as you put attention on her, only her, all her for some time each day.
You can take these strategies into the physical realm too.
Encourage her femininity by taking her shopping for a sexy outfit.
“Claim her” physically by putting your arms around her, holding her hand, putting your hands on the small of her back.
You can also be her “voice of authority.” Tell her what’s about to happen during your lovemaking. Lead her, guide her, pre-frame her sexual excitement.
The Alpha Male is the cross between the “cool guy” and the “big brother.” You want to tease and play with her in ways that highlight sweet things about her. She’ll feel like you love and appreciate her more when in addition to romantic loving and sexual loving, you also tease her playfully.
Just watch her smile when you notice something clever or cute that she’s doing and tease her positively about it. Just never shame or humiliate her or make a joke at her expense!
Confident men with personal authority are not stressed, not whiny, not rigid – they are relaxed and playful.
If you want to focus on cultivating more masculinity in your life start with being playful, noticing her and appreciating her, rewarding her for behaviors that bring you joy and further you can also:
Make sure she knows your life plan.
Go for a promotion at work and show her you are ambitious.
Push a skill set or hobby to the next level of mastery.
Give yourself a little make over. When did you last get your teeth cleaned? New glasses? A new haircut? Wear a shirt she likes? Get fashionable shoes? Cut, clean and file your nails? Manscape that unruly nest down there? How can you show up as more desirable to her?
When you focus on your continued personal growth, your woman will want to ride that ride with you.
I’d appreciate your questions and comments as much as I’d appreciate your sharing this post with your online friends.
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This is basically saying that the man should need nothing from the woman that she needs from him. He’s supposed to have everything all figured out, always be confident and sure of himself, while supporting her sense of confidence and worth by complimenting and doing all the things mentioned in the talk. That he should get all the validation he needs from within, while she gets her nurturing and validation externally with his words and actions. Of course its an ideal that everyone, men and women, source these things from within. But it seems that this viewpoint is that a lot is expected of the man that isn’t from the woman. I need to feel safe too, I don’t want to be in control all the time, i have insecurities and vulnerabilities as well, and this casts a huge burden and expectation to live up to. it’s the fairytale like superman that has been glorified in our culture. It honestly makes me depressed to think that a woman would want or expect me to be like this. I need someone to be the riverbanks of my river as well. I have emotions and feelings and feminine aspects too. I can be masculine, and I am, but this is a version of masculinity that expects a man to be a woman’s “rock”. And Ill be her rock, but she needs to give back the same to me, that is what I desire. I have not had an easy life. I am a young man who has endured over a decade of chronic illness and fought very hard just to survive. Masculine/feminine polarity of the genders is something I’ve struggled with a lot in my life and has caused me a lot of internal conflict and frustration. I have been told that I come across as very masculine by a woman, but its an expectation I would like to be cast away. I sometimes long to play the other role. It sounds liberating. To have a woman come along and sweep me off my feet and tell me everything is going to be okay, and I CAN surrender and stop worrying, let someone else take control, and feel safe in my own body. We can be eachother’s strength and support, and everything in between, without any one-sided-ness.
I agree with you. See my response to Christina. I hope you find a PARTNER. A person who can wind along beside your river, where sometimes you are the strength and sometimes she is. As an Alpha woman by design—what I mean is I too, like Christina grew up with a misogynistic, autocratic father who told me starting at my earliest memory of age 7 that I was a “stupid woman, and unworthy.” It’s no surprise I don’t want some domineering man dictating my life. If you understand the concepts of Yin and Yang, I am very Yang in the outside world, BUT(!!!), I am Yin in my intimate life. I don’t want to be so strong in the bedroom.
My husband had a rough life too, some level of neglect, an undiagnosed learning disability, and poverty. He too has issues, and our marriage is arranged by each of our strengths and weaknesses. Our marriage works well, and we support each other according to our strengths. I do wish, however, he would take a little bit more of an assertive role in the bedroom from time to time, after all, variety is really what keeps things alive. But I hope you find your compliment person to your struggles.
The sad truth, is if you want to find someone who understands your struggles, they too will likely have empathy from their own struggles. You may find someone who gives you that unconditional support and safety you crave, but you may have to support them in ways that require a lot of effort on your part to get what you need. Hence the best person for you, will be someone who’s “issues” compliment yours. Expand your friend group–that’s how I met my husband. We were friends for 4 years before we decided we might be a great match. Good luck, and do everything you can in the interim to learn to make yourself happy. This will give you the best chance to have a successful relationship. Best Wishes.
I pray for a Divine partner.
We need to be more masculine, Alpha male, the leader, the rock, in relationship and life! And need them looks to of course and i wonteven mention penis size even if it works well..Naruraly God & genetics gives every man the personal strengths and resources to Calmly, Playfully be this super man stud way? And if he dont got it he gets rejected by the desirable women and shamed for his “weakness” as well.. Meanwhile, all a woman realy has to do is look reasonably pretty, be sexualy open, and be nice and she’s got 50+ guys at her doorstep fighting to be first!..And guys like me end up alone with a rubber doll, porn, alcohol and depression..From my loser incel perspective, its just not fair!!
Its’ sad. The woman you describe will NEVER be happy, and all those guys are just as shallow as she is. Make friends with women–that’s how you find a good partner by being friends first. Most women are not like you describe. You need to take a good look at yourself and see if YOUR expectations are realistic and figure out what you want and ask yourself “why?” you want what you think you do. If you are just looking at pretty faces and do not get to know women, then you will never have a woman who adores you. You will be barking up the wrong tree. You should look for a partner, not an arm prize.
Susan, I have learned so much from you and agree with polarity but disagree with some of your assertions. Your potshot agaist feminists is wrong. It is feminists who are trying to empower womnen’s sexuality and free women from sexual abuse. If patriarchal men had not been taking advantage of women for the past 3000 years, there would be no job for feminists and women would not have so much self hatred. Women have to survive in the world that men created and for many women this means taking on masculine characteristics. I had to do that myself to be sucessful. Understandably, in a personal relationship, things work differently.
The statement “If she makes the decisions, the plans, and determines what’s acceptable in your relationship, if she sets the tone, then you have forfeited your masculine leadership.” Is really scary. It is a recipe for women to be taken advantage of. Just live with my dictator father and have him crush your soul and ruin your life if you want to be dominated. While I do agree with the concept of masculine leadership, I do not agree with the concept of domination, no matter how benign you try to make it sound. There has to be a check and balance system or men will take it too far. We also have to acknowlege that women have the power to decide what is right for themselves, to include whether they want to go along with a man’s decisions.
For some women, a more dominant man is never going to work. It’s ok either way. Glad you know what you like!
Your talk on polarity was nice, nice to listen to anyway. Me being this masculine rock isnt possible with my limitations and problems.. So i end up alone with a rubber doll,porn,alcohol and depression..Hard to ignore my desires and needs.. A way out i need..
I can agree with that. But try not to crush your man’s ego with a heavy helping of your masculine nature, right in his face.!
I agree with you, Christina. Most men don’t understand the crap women go through on a daily basis–it’s why I had to endure a bunch of crap men before I found my husband.
This article fails to take into account people’s individual strengths and weaknesses, learning disabilities or disorders and trauma endured from childhood or a younger age. Plus when she said that a strong man is part “cool guy” and “part big brother,” I think I barfed a little in my mouth. “Cool guys” are usually douche bags and hells no to a relationship with “cool guy” on any level. My husband is strong and tough, but no egotistical, macho or cool guy. He is quite strong. He never tells me what to do or how to do it.
I am the one who makes the plans, makes Dr.s appointments, pays the bills and figures bureaucratical crap out. My husband has a learning disability, and lots of trauma from childhood, and he has zero patience for red tape, sorting through details that are data heavy and being organized. He has strengths, but taking charge of the planning and logistics of our lives are not them. I don’t mind, because they are my strong points. He is very manly in other ways, including the way he approaches handling me, he is super respectful, was asking me if touching me was OK long before it was the recommended way men should behave. He has never made me feel like I “owe” him for anything. He sticks to his word, he is honest and loyal to the bone, and I know he would never ever cheat on me. You cannot have that kind of confidence from “cool guy.”
Calling out patriarchy is spot on, and it’s a tough dance for men to be strong, but not abide by the patriarchal BS of society that is toxic to women. I don’t think that was addressed well in this article. I don’t need a man to babysit me, I want a willing partner that can clearly see BOTH our strengths and weaknesses and will work with me to figure out our best attack on life to work to our advantage. THAT is taking charge in my world. Not someone who tells me my life plan.
Pls email the “Stealth Turnaround Tricks”.
Holy spot on with the polarity article and the 2 compliments. only a few paragraphs into it,I called my lover and cherished her(with specifics) and told her of the things that i desired about her(ie, sexy butt) and i could feel her squirm with pleasure, and she reflected it back to me. To leading the relationship!! Thank You
The smartest people APPLY what they learn. You did a great job!
Susan you are a gift, your husband is lucky guy, you are hot and sassy. I would definitely ask you out if you were not married. Keep up your work, is good quality. I wish more woman were like you, you say it as it is.
Think what you feel
Say what u think
Do what you say
Be str8 w urself nr intentions, ur feelings, ur words n ur actions. And b exactly the same with ur relationships.
Stay simple. Minimize talking about what ur gonna stop doing or start doing, n promises, or convincing, even if u believe it.rather,Communicate each of those words with the actual actions. Let ur actions do most of ur talking for promises. If ur hearts feelings, ur minds thoughts, ur mouths words, n ur bodies actions are in agreement, n consistent, u will move with certainty, n powered purpose, with conscious sigularity compleye self control over ur feelings, thoughts, actions, n ur life.Unified in congruence, solid, dignified, freeing up all ur conscious awareness into singularity of focus, lively attentive n fully Present to ur every moment every move every decision. That singular grounded steel like solidity n certainty, Complete Strong Presence is so powerful, it’s itimidating, n commands respect, energetically. Most ppl will fray into more fragmented states, which can’t hold their own personal state of congruence n strength, bcuz the sheer power of the other gentlemens sheer grounded Presence commands by natural law, Masculine Alpha Prowess, n exudes centralized core dignified Self Competence, n Strength,n Independence. This solidarity of a singular centered man of mind body n soul is like that of a grounding steel rod of magnetically immeasurable power presence, in ur face, n unapologetic force. He himself Is the force, n as it reaches his lower animal nature, his Fallin magnetism bums astronomically amplified, n women , (and men), submit to him, but women also r polarized into submission of their feminine polarity n greatly influenced autonomously into states of hungry intollerable sexual hypnosis like trance of affixed desire to be his obedient servant. His power so great, the fullness of Masculine Polarity, also Emin ates such a strength of ferocity n fear. It is Alpha among all alphas of planet Earth. The Human Male Alpha is the creme DE LA creme of Evolutions Pinal of Prowess. In its fullness,the man whom masters this polarity, will even find wild animals part for him n submit to him. Lions, Bears, ALL. Bcuz they all submit to Alpha, n Man whom attains Alpha polarity, literally, rules the planet, n all inhabitants, simply by sheer universal law, regardless to personal opinions or choice. U will actually fold bow in willing obedience.the whole of ur Being as a whole automatically sums up him n then sums thehighest state of ur Beings dignified wholeness, n even bad asses, are like a stem of fluffy Lil flowers in his presence. I thought I was pretty solid, high integrity very congruent, n my all, next to Alpha of Alphas, turned me,into a grand total of fluffy flowers, metaphorically, that’s what I felt like n wut I saw in my mind. N, I thought id never bow down, cuz nobodies better than anybody, is how i thought, n I wasn’t scared,but, I was completely solid in my position. I felt excited to here masters orders. I was a Lil sponge ready for the Champions orders. I cd feel, everything n anything coming from this Being is fucking hyperspace levels beyond me. So congruent w universal laws. And Lil Ole french fry piece me, can’t even fathom how I cd handle the impact n vast power of anything this Being had anything to do with, but, he knows, n he picked me, n I layer in a completely prideless,surrendered limp state, but yet not feeling weak about me. I felt he’s him I’m me. He’s master, just a fact, but I’m much weaker, but I didn’t feel bad about me. I still believed in me totally. He master, but, I’m me, he’s him. Universal law dictates his mastery over me. But, I’m solid where I’m at, n my uniqueness is my true value, n true self. As is for all. But, we can only reach ability to reach full expression upon building our “character” like his, so that our body bums a empty cleansed out pristine instrument of which to allow full unimpeded unique identyless true nature b expressed nakedly, without any controlling it, but just letting it flow. Thru the instrument of ur body heart n mind which are cleansed of toxic energies n that flow congruently in line with universal laws of love compassion, integrity respect for all Beings equally, not based on a merrit system that determines a differwnt value to people or bugs etc no matter how evil or saintly. But, an unequivocal inherent respect to all, not bcuz it’s right, or good or kind to do so, but only bcuz u know it’s not an opinion, but an absolute eternal fact.
Anyway, then I can release my jewel, my “flaw” undisciplined, untamed wild, natural unique self, reserved in my heart and my cock. So, now I got turned inside out, n my heart, n love was layered along the cubic walls of the vacuum space box of thi a master alpha characters shell. It was empty of life, of uniquness, but maintained a Lazer piercing presence of awareness n fucking the cleanest love beyond love. An inside version of motherly love or sweet love, it was SOUND clean clear concise n so genuine, that it was dignified squarely in line with cosmic law, n eternally true. The universe deemed me dignified (unbreakable so solidly coherent that it’s the very structure blocks that hold up the entire universe. But, Alpha, I call him Father God. I always hated religion n old testament n that God. I liked buddha, n still do. But, I understand Him now. And tho it was cosmic law that dignified me, I earned it, with His Massive help,n many others. But, I cd still feel His Personal Affection n personal love for me, just so beautiful n clean n solid n honorable. Every single not good enuff, every validation, every single lack n every single attempt of every kind to achieve things ALL without exception are ALL seeking this and this ALONE. I was validated n seen n understood sincerely on my every single point in life, He knew. And He doesn’t agree ever to b nice, Or Love you to make u feel good. He’s Boss, He don’t play, He handles business without a blink. He is 100% pure genuine. N u love n respect Him so much 4 that. N,u can feel He won’t sway, at all. He stands in a state of soldiers attention in salute to you, str8 face, doesn’t say a word with his mouth, holds his ground infinitely, yet equally bows his head half way in Genuine personal Honoring of you.N, Hrs so Present attentive to ONLY uou, that he is silent n gives u an open space n time just for you. N, the entire attention of the universe is given pause n open honorable space for only you. N, I was dignified into a Man Alpha Man.we e all r dignified by our own right, that’s one half of us, the other is the other end which is earned, reached consciously, n thus u are fully dignified inner n outer, n bcum holographically sound. Pure Dignified to the highest level.inside out backward forward n every direction n twist n turn n angel, u are unchanged n unhook bcuz ur so centered n dignified. But now. U r ready for ur woman queen of dignified holographic perfection, she whom ALL of thus work has been for in bcuming this. So I cd give her the best possible man n everything at the best of the best possible, so that I cd hv a maximum range of which to express my unique personal love n adoring affection n appreciation n respect for her, together w her. That is my belief what the sole purpose n drive is was has always been for, ALL to reach y his, 2 true love in complete vulnerable in c I nite expression. On the deepest most secretive private vulnerable cores of eavhother, that is never to b fixed. But it is us, the flaw is our personal inperfection, but it always is making mistakes fumbles n embarrassed, etc, but being embraced n chetidhed, so so so deeply intimate, that all life love n infinity endless wonderland of newness unique creation n experience is the res I lt of this marrizge. Where it’s so deep that in each moment we are consciously alive n lively loving n dancing n communing in every new moment and old moment, we are simultaneously alive n endlessly creating loving together fully n equally b ontinuously eternally consciously freshly in every moment . That’s how fully we are attentively immersed in each others presence n fully sincere n loving infinitely, that it won’t die, or pass, or not b without that fullness . It’s crazy. I love you Father. I love you Lita.
Father, what’s she doing? Why is she acting like she is. Is a guy thrre? God Forbid.
I had to listen to this twice & found most of it spot on related to my experiences, especially the part about what each sex is looking for! As a woman I think most men ‘get’ most of what you mentioned, but need more help understanding our need of support in the emotions capacity-perhaps because that is so contrary to their masculinity? I wish I had some way to share this information w my boyfriend that wouldnt make him feel like Im trying to ‘lead” or “fix him” but only help us reach the next level.
Thanks for the information!
its hard to keep a woman for ever ..what is say is real..but hard…to maintain life long
i like what you’ve said, it all works for me
Competence + Polarity + Trust = Surrender
that is true
I came across Personal Life Media by casual surfing. I listened to the Polarity talk, and was impressed by your deep understanding of the essential characteristics of masculine and feminine energies and personality. I agreed with practically everything you said. I’ve felt for some time now that having a strong sense of self that enables me to take care of myself and have the additional awareness to see the genuine needs/desire of my partner in a loving and caring way will encourage her to trust me. Now, THAT was a rather long previous sentence, wasn’t it? But I think it rings true, to me at least. And when I speak of caring for my partner, I am coming from a place of someone who has been single for a few years, but has endeavoured to resolve negative habits/conditioned reflexes/ established patterns from my formative years etc.
By the way, since I know nothing about you, what city do you live in? I’m living in Vancouver, Canada.
You have a very musical and “personal” tone of voice. I also enjoyed how you didn’t edit out any minor grammatical mishaps – they were teeny and gave me a feeling of authenticity coming from you. I have listened to other blogs/sales urls in music, health and dating/attraction sites that are spoken by “perfect” and sped up voice overs.
In the end, I find your points of view positive, helpful and very affirmative for both genders. From both your insightful content and voice, I have to say YOU are very attractive. I have a hunch you are having a great life.
Thanks again for your considered research and eloquence of spoken ideas.