How To Rekindle A Marriage
3 Steps That Rekindle Your Marital Passion:
- Have Sex.
- Touch and Cuddle Romantically.
- Add Variety And Novelty.
This is me, Susan Bratton, with Dr. Helen Fisher, an anthropologist at Rutgers University and author of a number of excellent books on love and attraction.
At a recent National Public Radio live interview Tim asked the question, “Is it possible for a husband to restart the physical intimacy with a wife after many years?”
Helen replied that it IS possible to remain in love long term. Her work putting spouses who we’re “madly in love” into MRI machines resulted in “insane activity in the reward area of the brain.” You can be madly in love 20, 30, 50 years into a relationship.
And in order to rekindle that intense romantic love three things are required, according to Helen.
The first is, “have sex.”
In order to maintain sexual attraction, you must simply have sex. The more sex you have, the more you want. Having sex drives up the testosterone in both partners, increasing the desire for each other.
She says that if you are not currently having much sex, “schedule it!” The mere act of scheduling and having it will ramp you to wanting it more frequently, which will bring you closer together physically and emotionally.
The second way to rekindle a marriage is through increase in romantic love. This is the kind of attachment that generates Oxytocin, the “cuddle hormone.” Holding hands, kissing, cuddling, and nurturing, sensual and sexual touch stimulates Oxytocin, which bonds couples together and gives you a feeling of attachment, grounding, and for women, security. Feelings of safety and security increase a woman’s willingness to make love.
That’s why I suggest that husbands who want to Revive Her Drive first romance her, then re-awaken her sensuality before moving into seduction or sexual approaches.
The third recommendation Dr. Fisher suggest is doing something NEW. “Novelty helps drive dopamine, which fuels romantic love,” says Helen.
You can leverage these “Love Chemicals” by taking your woman on romantic dates to new places and making sure you hold her hand, kiss and cuddle her. Then take her home and make love to her. This will keep your marriage intensely romantic.
Having just celebrated my 20th Wedding Anniversary, I can tell you that it is possible for your love to continue to build and deepen throughout the years. And it is possible to get it back if you think it’s gone.
For step-by-step ideas to romance her, awaken her sensually and for seduction strategies that wives appreciate, the Revive Her Drive program offers myriad of wonderful ideas to on-ramp your woman to her ultimate sensual and sexual potential. Lead her there. She’ll love you even more for it.